So I know I've gotten terribly behind in my posts, things have just been really crazy. The city is constantly moving, and I spend a good portion of my day on my other blog trying to explain that pro-choice is about options, not oppression. It's exhausting, but I've found that once the vital nature of reproductive rights becomes clear to you it's impossible (for me, at least) to stop trying.
Things are pretty quiet around the office, we're mostly preparing for the youth to arrive on July 1st. I've heard they are a great group, if not a little quiet, and I'm really looking forward to getting to know them and hearing their stories. Although I've only been there a short time, it was immediately apparent that the NARAL employees are completely devoted to making the office a safe space for these youth, a place where they can come and talk or do homework or just hang out. They are invested in their futures and go out of their way to help them in any and every way possible. It's really amazing.
It occurred to me the other day that I managed to make the post for my mother just in time for father's day. I came across this article from Everysaturdaymorning, a blog published by clinic escorts from Louisville, KY -
"Every Saturday Morning wonderful, brave, compassionate volunteers come out before the sun comes up to provide emotional and tactical support for people accessing Reproductive and Sexual medical care. We are a diverse group of people who all work together to make sure this resource is available to our community. We are a decentralized group of autonomous individuals who come together to empower ourselves and others. This is the most effective and non-hierarchical work I have ever participated in and am constantly amazed at the intensity of it all. There are lots of days that I hate that this is even necessary, but it is. And we will keep going because Reproductive and Sexual Justice is essential to a healthy, empowered world. It's simultaneously fascinating, horrifying and uplifting to read first-hand accounts of escort experiences, and the posts are always thought provoking.
The specific article I mentioned above, however, "Father’s Day: Dan’s thoughts" brought me to tears. He describes his rage at the male protesters outside the clinic, "those disapproving men–fathers, grandfathers, and uncles–disapproving of women who could be their daughters, granddaughters, nieces, or even their wives. Disapproving men, withholding their love and attention, ignoring the needs of their young charges who look to them for guidance, look to them for the unconditional love and acceptance expected of a father, look to them for comfort at their times of greatest need. Disapproving men willing to abandon their daughters during their moment of deepest emotional distress, embarrassment, and fear, and leave them to walk through this gauntlet of hatred with a complete stranger, a man who will be in her life for only a few minutes, but is willing and able to be her surrogate father." (emphasis mine).
Naturally, this post made me think about my own father and the unwavering support he has always shown. As I mentioned in my "Dear Mom" post, the women in his family have a history of staunch pro-choice activism but he never pushed me in one direction or another. He allowed me to find this path all on my own, and sure enough, here I am. My heart goes out to the poor, terrified girl the poster describes and makes me want to hug my own father so badly. He has never let me down, not once, and I know he never will. I know that through every challenge and obstacle I will face, he will be there to love and support me every step of the way. I know he will never judge me or abandon me, and for that I am so, so grateful. I know how lucky I am to have a man like my father in my life at all, let alone as my #1 fan. Happy [belated] father's day, Daddy. Your passionate, pro-choice, pro-family, pro-equality Jewish feminist daughter loves you more than words can possibly hope to describe.
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
Day 2
Today started a little late (I didn't need to be at the office until 12:30) but around the NARAL offices things were pretty busy. I got to meet the other TORCH intern, Maya, who is a grad student at Columbia. We both are really passionate about what we're doing and I think we'll work well together. A good portion of the day was spent going over orientation material, discussing the structure of the program and the roles we will play.
I asked Faye a question that had been on my mind for some time - we're going to be working very closely with the teenage group and the subject matter we're covering can get very personal. Is there some kind of party line as to how much personal information we are allowed to share with them? This question came out of a previous experience as a counselor when there was a camper who clearly needed support and guidance but due to restrictions on how personal a counselor can get with a camper, I never was able to sit down and talk out the issue with the camper in question. I always have felt badly about it, and it was part of the reason I didn't return to that job. Faye assured me that we can share as much as we feel comfortable sharing, which put me at ease. I don't particularly feel the need to fill the group in on the details of my personal life, but being able to be frank and honest about their questions and concerns is key in establishing trust and open communication.
This past fall I watched a movie for class called Dreamworlds 3: Desire, Sex and Power in Music Video. The first time I watched it, I was completely blown away. My family didn't get cable until I left for college (how convenient) so I've never been particularly well-versed in the world of MTV or music videos, but I think even those who grew up watching the channel will be shocked and appalled once the images are put into context. The film does a beautiful job connecting the highly constructed portrayals of femininity and masculinity from the "dreamworld" of music videos to real-life street harassment, sexual assault, stalking and rape. The entire film can be viewed on YouTube, and I encourage everyone to see it. I'd really like to show this film to the group and discuss how these images play directly into rape culture, but it's a little long and I want to keep them engaged. What I'm probably going to end up doing is just showing selections interspersed with discussion. I think (and hope) they'll be able to relate to the analysis the film puts forth, particularly when it comes to experiences of street harassment (which is sadly common in New York - I've been here since Friday and I've been whistled at, catcalled at, and been subjected to unwanted advances more than a few times). I have to admit, I'll be a little disappointed if they're not as into it as I am, but I suppose I'll have to wait and see.
On a side note, I keep a tumblr that focuses primarily on abortion as well as a number of other queer and feminist issues (and arguing with 15-year-olds who have a bad habit of essentializing, slut-shaming and victim-blaming), but today I got a message that made it all worth it:
"I'm seriously considering renaming my blog 'what naomiwaxman said.' Thanks for the always erudite and on-point posts. It gives me something to aspire to."
Just that one little comment made my day. It's amazing how much a little positive reinforcement can reinvigorate a person.
Kisses and contraception,
Naomi
I asked Faye a question that had been on my mind for some time - we're going to be working very closely with the teenage group and the subject matter we're covering can get very personal. Is there some kind of party line as to how much personal information we are allowed to share with them? This question came out of a previous experience as a counselor when there was a camper who clearly needed support and guidance but due to restrictions on how personal a counselor can get with a camper, I never was able to sit down and talk out the issue with the camper in question. I always have felt badly about it, and it was part of the reason I didn't return to that job. Faye assured me that we can share as much as we feel comfortable sharing, which put me at ease. I don't particularly feel the need to fill the group in on the details of my personal life, but being able to be frank and honest about their questions and concerns is key in establishing trust and open communication.
This past fall I watched a movie for class called Dreamworlds 3: Desire, Sex and Power in Music Video. The first time I watched it, I was completely blown away. My family didn't get cable until I left for college (how convenient) so I've never been particularly well-versed in the world of MTV or music videos, but I think even those who grew up watching the channel will be shocked and appalled once the images are put into context. The film does a beautiful job connecting the highly constructed portrayals of femininity and masculinity from the "dreamworld" of music videos to real-life street harassment, sexual assault, stalking and rape. The entire film can be viewed on YouTube, and I encourage everyone to see it. I'd really like to show this film to the group and discuss how these images play directly into rape culture, but it's a little long and I want to keep them engaged. What I'm probably going to end up doing is just showing selections interspersed with discussion. I think (and hope) they'll be able to relate to the analysis the film puts forth, particularly when it comes to experiences of street harassment (which is sadly common in New York - I've been here since Friday and I've been whistled at, catcalled at, and been subjected to unwanted advances more than a few times). I have to admit, I'll be a little disappointed if they're not as into it as I am, but I suppose I'll have to wait and see.
On a side note, I keep a tumblr that focuses primarily on abortion as well as a number of other queer and feminist issues (and arguing with 15-year-olds who have a bad habit of essentializing, slut-shaming and victim-blaming), but today I got a message that made it all worth it:
"I'm seriously considering renaming my blog 'what naomiwaxman said.' Thanks for the always erudite and on-point posts. It gives me something to aspire to."
Just that one little comment made my day. It's amazing how much a little positive reinforcement can reinvigorate a person.
Kisses and contraception,
Naomi
Monday, June 14, 2010
Day 1
The day went better than I could have imagined. I arrived about five minutes early and immediately ran into Faye, the lovely director of the TORCH program. Apparently the other intern called in sick, so Faye didn't really want to go through the orientation material without her which was completely understandable. We walked around the office and I was introduced to a whole bunch of people (I'm not great with names so I have a feeling I'll need to introduce myself a few more times). The office is gorgeous, with lots of light, and everybody was incredibly nice. The whole experience was kind of surreal.
Faye showed me the folders with the various activities for each topic (abortion, sexual orientation & gender identity, body image, etc.) and I started going through some of the more outdated handouts from the sexual orientation and gender identity. I think that to truly understand things like transgender issues and even feminism for that matter one needs to understand the terminology. For example, understanding the difference between sex (biological aspects of being male or female: chromosomes, genitalia, hormones - primary and secondary sex characteristics) and gender (social phenomena associated with masculinity, femininity) is key in understanding transgender identities. While I don't profess to be any kind of expert on trans issues, I believe I've had enough academic and personal experience with the topic to outline and discuss the basics so I mentioned to Faye that I may want to spend some time specifically focusing on trans issues with the group. There are lots of terms so I started taking pre-existing lists of terms apart and rearranging them into a more cohesive list. I've added a few terms as well (pansexuality, genderqueer) but I have to be careful not to get ahead of myself. It's going to be a little tricky planning to do activities and discussions because I'm not really sure how familiar they are with these concepts and terms, so I guess I'll have to somewhat play it by ear.
My parents left today, it was really fantastic having them here to help me move in and adjust to life in the city. I had very little turn-around time between school ending and arriving in New York, and I honestly couldn't have done it without them. They have been so supportive of me, both in coming to the city and with the work I'm doing. I miss them and my boyfriend terribly, but I know this is an important experience for me to have.
Hopefully one of the women at the office is going to connect me with a clinic escort program, so I can volunteer with them on the weekends, and I'll probably be tabling at Manhattan Pride. If you're in the city and need some condoms, come on by!
Kisses and contraception,
Naomi
Faye showed me the folders with the various activities for each topic (abortion, sexual orientation & gender identity, body image, etc.) and I started going through some of the more outdated handouts from the sexual orientation and gender identity. I think that to truly understand things like transgender issues and even feminism for that matter one needs to understand the terminology. For example, understanding the difference between sex (biological aspects of being male or female: chromosomes, genitalia, hormones - primary and secondary sex characteristics) and gender (social phenomena associated with masculinity, femininity) is key in understanding transgender identities. While I don't profess to be any kind of expert on trans issues, I believe I've had enough academic and personal experience with the topic to outline and discuss the basics so I mentioned to Faye that I may want to spend some time specifically focusing on trans issues with the group. There are lots of terms so I started taking pre-existing lists of terms apart and rearranging them into a more cohesive list. I've added a few terms as well (pansexuality, genderqueer) but I have to be careful not to get ahead of myself. It's going to be a little tricky planning to do activities and discussions because I'm not really sure how familiar they are with these concepts and terms, so I guess I'll have to somewhat play it by ear.
My parents left today, it was really fantastic having them here to help me move in and adjust to life in the city. I had very little turn-around time between school ending and arriving in New York, and I honestly couldn't have done it without them. They have been so supportive of me, both in coming to the city and with the work I'm doing. I miss them and my boyfriend terribly, but I know this is an important experience for me to have.
Hopefully one of the women at the office is going to connect me with a clinic escort program, so I can volunteer with them on the weekends, and I'll probably be tabling at Manhattan Pride. If you're in the city and need some condoms, come on by!
Kisses and contraception,
Naomi
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Tomorrow
Tomorrow I will begin my journey.
Well, I suppose my journey has already begun. I arrived in New York this past Friday, spent the past two days figuring out how to get from point A to point B (it's a bit trickier than it sounds - I've had one subway mishap already) and tomorrow is my first day at NARAL.
I have the distinct pleasure of interning with the TORCH Program (Teen Outreach Reproductive CHallenge). According to the NARAL website, "TORCH is a nationally recognized program that combines peer health education and leadership training of New York City youth, placing a strong emphasis on empowerment and team building.
Through peer outreach, community organizing, public speaking, and addressing the critical issues of reproductive health care, young people build their self esteem, learn leadership skills, and make responsible choices in their lives."
So basically, I'll be working with a group of teenagers from all over NYC, teaching them "to give presentations on a range of adolescent health issues to interested youth groups and schoools city-wide."
Needless to say, I'm nervous, excited and a little bit terrified. I want to do a good job so badly, to help imbue these young people (who, now that I think about it, are not much younger than myself) with knowledge and confidence.
Tonight I'm a little too anxious to be articulate, but I'll be blogging throughout my time at NARAL this summer. I suppose I should at least attempt to get some sleep... I'll certainly have more to say tomorrow!
xo Naomi
Well, I suppose my journey has already begun. I arrived in New York this past Friday, spent the past two days figuring out how to get from point A to point B (it's a bit trickier than it sounds - I've had one subway mishap already) and tomorrow is my first day at NARAL.
I have the distinct pleasure of interning with the TORCH Program (Teen Outreach Reproductive CHallenge). According to the NARAL website, "TORCH is a nationally recognized program that combines peer health education and leadership training of New York City youth, placing a strong emphasis on empowerment and team building.
Through peer outreach, community organizing, public speaking, and addressing the critical issues of reproductive health care, young people build their self esteem, learn leadership skills, and make responsible choices in their lives."
So basically, I'll be working with a group of teenagers from all over NYC, teaching them "to give presentations on a range of adolescent health issues to interested youth groups and schoools city-wide."
Needless to say, I'm nervous, excited and a little bit terrified. I want to do a good job so badly, to help imbue these young people (who, now that I think about it, are not much younger than myself) with knowledge and confidence.
Tonight I'm a little too anxious to be articulate, but I'll be blogging throughout my time at NARAL this summer. I suppose I should at least attempt to get some sleep... I'll certainly have more to say tomorrow!
xo Naomi
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